In my neighborhood, just about every store that isn’t a nail salon is a restaurant. Thus it’s not surprising that enterprising food purveyors do whatever they can to entice customers, including displaying these signs:
The price of one of these LUNCH SPECIALS ($15) isn’t unreasonable in New York City, especially considering that they’re offering WOODFIRED SANDWICHES, which are . . . well, I don’t know what they are. Bread charred by burning branches? Unemployed victims of forest downsizing?
My friend Catherine sent this one:
I had no opportunity to speak with the SANDWITCH, who I assume was selling a consultation lasting as long as it takes to drink a cup of FREE COFFEE. If I had, I would have asked about the accuracy of the spells in Harry Potter as well as the rationale for enclosing FREE COFFEE in quotation marks. Perhaps the brew isn’t actually COFFEE?
I should note that the prices listed below have increased since I snapped the photo:
Inflation or not, who could resist an offer to DESIGNED YOUR OWN SALAD? Also, 16 oz (ounces) equals one pound. Thus the restaurant is offering a one-, two-, or three-pound salad, each with 1 meat and unlimited vege. I must ask: Who has room for much (many?) vege after eating three pounds of DESIGNED SALAD?
Last one:
If Mom gets Fri, who gets all the other days? I’m a Mom, but I prefer Tuesdays. Can non-Moms get the LUNCH Special on Fri?
My advice is to choose a restaurant carefully, eat well, and in the spirit of today’s MLK holiday, find a way to work for a more just world.
Is “purveyer” with an “e” also ok? Looked it up and found it with an “o.”
Although I prefer browned, slightly charred sandwiches, I wouldn’t bitten those “woodfired” off!
Thanks for catching that typo! Purveyor is indeed spelled with an O and not an E. I’ve corrected the post. By the way, I also like “browned, slightly charred” food — usually not sandwiches, though.
Hilarious finds! We have similarly nutty errors in signs here too, of course. We also have a whole other category of signs (and menus!) that look like they were written by a very drunken sailor: bad translations from French to English! Mind you, at least they tried. [eye roll] Thanks for the chuckles and groans!
You’re (not “your”) most welcome, Ellie!